Wednesday, March 26, 2008

We Bought Grass



Drug Dealing At It's Finest!
(rated F-funny again!)
I was reading my blog from last night still laughing at one of my finer moments. Thinking how cheesy it was and that you all probably think I am pretty lame. Sorry about that. This won't help that image much either. But it makes me laugh too. I guess that is a lot what police work is about, laughing. We laugh at how stupid people really are. The average person just doesn't see this part of society thank goodness. And not that I am trying to show only the stupid stuff, but you have to admit it is more fun, and more interesting to hear about this stuff than the average run of the mill day to day boring life stuff. Right? And then again, I hope you can find the humor in this stuff and that I am not so warped that only I (and maybe other officers) find it funny. But here goes another one. This is really short so don't expect too much OK?
Being one female of only about five on our department I was selected to work with the narcotics unit from time to time. If we had a female informant that had to have a female officer to strip search the informant and to wire her up. (To record the transaction) OK, side note here. I have a lot of respect for the narcotic officers. They have the worst job in the whole world. Their hours are horrible, the people they deal with are some of the lowest, sickest people in this world and if you know ANYTHING about drugs, you are dealing with a drug not a person. That person has no control over their lives any longer. I have so much sympathy for people on drugs. I feel so bad for them and their families. It is not a pleasant life, one of drug or alcohol abuse. So when I am asked to work with the narcs I do so for I respect those guys, but I honestly hate that part of the job. People get killed, they DIE because of drugs and there is nothing to say one night on a drug buy that won't happen to me or you. Narcotic officers are sick sick people as well, but they have a job, a horrible job to do!!!
OK, back on track here. We were working a deal one night and it goes something like this:
Phone call, informant to dealer.
Informant: Hey man do you have any grass? I want to buy some grass.
Dealer: Yeah I've got some, how much do you want?
Informant: Oh I don't know, maybe just a dime bag. When can we meet up?
Dealer: I am getting ready to leave so it will be later.
Informant: No, man I need it now, I can run by now to get it.
Dealer: No, I am leaving. I'll tell you what. I will leave it at the bottom of the stairs on the underside. (they were outside stairs leading up to the second floor of this little old house.) I will leave it there and you can leave the money there under the rock. I will be back later to get it.
You better not (screw) me over.
Informant: No man, I wouldn't do that to you. You know me, I have always been up front with you. Now is this some pretty good grass?
Dealer: Yea, this is some good grass dude.
Informant: OK
So we go and buy our "grass" for $35.00 bucks. Then we have to test it to make sure it was actually grass...it was. It was Bermuda grass!!!!!! We got ripped off big time. $35.00 bucks for some marijuana mixed in with Bermuda grass. Bermuda grass that you grow in your front yard lawn and mow. Bermuda!!!! I still laugh at that. OK, we got ripped off, but it didn't matter. It was the same as if they had sold us the real stuff, for they presented it as marijuana, but we paid $35.00 for GRASS. I still laugh out loud at that one. What, you mean you can't trust a drug dealer????

4 comments:

Debbie in NC said...

Lisa, ROFL, we both posted about GRASS today!

My son deals with MANY people in ER coming in on drugs. Cops bring them in and then it's on David and the guys from there. They work well together though.

Wish I could sell my grass!! I'd make a killing :)

Shirley said...

What do you mean, a crook can't trust a crook? I thought there was supposed to be honor among thieves.

I did get a chuckle from this. I like to watch COPS on tv. The people they deal with makes me feel, well, intelligent.

Eckmama said...

Your stories are totally cracking me up. I think it's because I can hear your voice in my head telling them.

SOMEBODY got blog-happy and I have a ton of posts to catch up on! :)
love you!

Debbie in NC said...

Hey girl! I just joined the Sky Watch last week and I already feel intimidated! Their photos are unbelievable. I don't have anything fancy like Photo Shop so mine are just puney looking LOL!

I hope you have a great weekend, take plenty of pics, and I look forward to seeing them!

Maybe I'll take camera on mower and catch something weird in creek!