Friday, May 30, 2008

Update to Disaster

I told you earlier that I would not be posting about my family members life and the events that surround the leaving of her husband. But I just have to get a few things off my chest. This man that I admired for so many years, that was married to my family member for over 25 years, that was a leader among church people and marriage conventions, left, moved in with her, and now has asked her to marry him. He is not even legally separated, not divorced, just checked out. Checked out of their lives. He left behind two teenage boys at home. They don't understand how their dad could do this. In one short month he has turned their lives upside down, ripped their hearts out, stomped on them, and now wants them to accept this new woman in their lives. How are you suppose to feel good towards a person like that? I don't want to hate or wish ill on another person, but how do you go on through life knowing that he has hurt them so badly. And all by his own choice. He just tell hers he doesn't love her, yet they just went on a cruise, we go out to eat together, run around together, he was always saying sweet things to her. He was kind and gentle. A big man, with a big heart for his family. What is going on in his head???!!! Why, how can someone do this. He told my family member that they have had problems for a long time. Really? News to her. Why didn't he suggest counseling? Why did they spend all this money on a cruise if he was just going to leave her and didn't love her. Why did he attend the Family Life Convention and RENEW their vows in front of hundreds of people. All for a woman he had met on the Internet and knew for a mere one or two weeks. Unless he was lying about that too. How can you become so absorbed in someones life and leave another life behind for that person that you don't even know anything about? And don't even get me started on THE OTHER WOMAN. Oh she is so godly," God is good, and has blessed her with such a wonderful man". I don't think God will bless her for living with a MARRIED man. And for helping him to destroy a family. What do these people use for brains!!!!
But I admire my family member. She is being very strong and very kind. Kinder than I could have been if it would have been me. She is not mean about it, but she is not letting him walk all over her. I really admire how she is maintaining herself. She will be able to put her head on the pillow at night and know she is doing what is right. She does not cuss at him, (maybe wants to) she is not hateful, still tells him she does not understand, tells him he is not the person she fell in love with, and has loved for the last 25 years. She does not want him back, she does not want to be hurt like this ever again, and she has devoted her life to her two sons. She is strong, she will survive, but I don't know how. Please keep her in your prayers, please keep her in your thoughts, and please send happy, peaceful vibes to a beautiful, wonderful, loving deserving of only the best, person that I know. I love you J .

4 comments:

Sage said...

Your family member will be in my thoughts. I will say a special prayer for her, and for her sons. It sounds like she can hold her head high, knowing she did nothing wrong. It's so tough when things like this happen in our families. It's supposed to happen to other people, not to us!

Let her know that she has your love and support. Be there for her. And tell her you have friends who are thinking of her and praying for her healing.

Blessings,
Marge

Mental P Mama said...

The cream always rises to the top. And you are watching it happen first-hand. Sending her and her sons nothing but good thoughts and prayers.

Debbie in NC said...

She will definitely be in my prayers Lisa. I know you are just dying to get a hold of him and wring his neck, aren't you? I really think men go through midlife crisis and should be shot!

No, seriously, I'm sure she is dumbfounded and I hope the kids can keep their relationship with their Dad...eventually.

Michelle said...

This is so devestating to her an the kids. I hope they are learning how not to treat a wife and mother of their children. Keeping them all in my thoughts.